Thursday, November 30, 2006

New Toy

So, I got a new toy last night. A 30GB iPod. I figure this could be considered a christmas present to myself. That's my justification.

So, anyway, why was I up until the wee hours loading all of my favorite music onto it?? This was no easy task. I found myself prioritizing my music. Artists I can't live without, Diana Ross, Lauryn Hill (Miseducation era), Jill Scott, Michael Jackson, Al Green, Jay Z, Talib Kweli. Then there was the chillaxin music, Musiq, Dwele, Harry Connick, Jamiroquai. And for my spiritual side, I have to add that Kirk Franklin - Hero and all of my Mary Mary.

But, I couldn't forget about my old school favorites,

'This is it what. Lucini from the sky. Let's get rich what...'

Camp Lo. Yep, I bought that CD. I loved that song, gotta upload that. And what about the Lost Boyz? Jeeps, Lex Coups, Bimaz & Benz and Renee. That Legal Drug Money CD was the bomb. And what about Salt & Peppa, I can't forget them. I can create my own Hip Hop Honors playlist. This is dope!

It seems like every few years, I have a new life soundtrack. So, while I was sitting there sorting through CD's, I couldn't help but reminisce about what I was doing when those songs came out. And if the memories were good, I just added it to the playlist. In a way, I can edit my life movie with this new toy. I can leave the unpleasant memories on the CD shelf. I don't have to carry them with me. How great is that? :-)

I'm no where near finished with my little project. I've still got a zillion memories to upload.


Monday, November 27, 2006

The Wire Episode #49

Incredible. I know I've said a zillion times how awesome this show is. But, each week I'm soo blown away. "It don't get no realer, son."

Politics - The investigator can't uncover the bodies because of the stats.

F the Police - You're gonna look out for me? For me? You got my back, huh? Last line of the episode. Is there any wonder why people are afraid to 'do the right thing'?

Namond's mom - Is she off the hook or what? She called her only child every name but a child of God. He's just not cut out for 'the game' and God bless him for it. Hopefully Bunny can rescue him. He's still redeemable.

Good Michael/Bad Michael - His plot line breaks my heart the most. This is what happens to a smart young man when life shows him that he can't trust anyone but himself. The damage is immeasurable.

I think there's only one more episode in this season. Usually at the end of each season we get some kind of closure on at least one of the main plot lines. I don't see that happening in Episode 50. That makes me so sad. But, that's life, you don't get always get closure...or a happy ending.


P.S. Was that security guard Robert Erlich?

Monday Blues

Bebe Moore Campbell passed away today. She was a great author whose books I really enjoyed reading. She died of brain cancer. She was only 56. How sad...


Sunday, November 26, 2006


We have a tradition in my family where at Thanksgiving dinner, everyone has to go around the table and say what they are thankful for. Most of us try to come up with something simple to avoid prolonging the feast. If I were to hold everyone up by naming each of the things I'm thankful for, everyone would faint from hunger.

I'm thankful for my family. That I have 3 sisters that I like and enjoy spending time with. That my mom is finally taking her health seriously. I'm thankful that my stepdad loves her no matter what. I'm thankful that my grandmom is still around. She's a pistol, but, I really appreciate her. I'm thankful that I have friends that have my back. Friends that will stick up for me without me knowing it. Friends that will say, 'that sounds fun.' when I come up with crazy activities for us to do.

I'm thankful that I have a job. A good job, where the people are fair with me. There was a time when I didn't have that, so, I feel overwhelmingly blessed now.

I'm sure I could come up with a million minute details of my life that I'm thankful for. But, I'll spare you that.

Hope you enjoyed your thanksgiving...


Monday, November 20, 2006

Celebrity Hit List

Most people have a Celebrity Hit List (CHL). This is a list of celebs that you'd hook up with if you had the chance. I think a person's list says a lot about what kind of people they're attracted to. For example, on my list are Idris Elba (an actor from The Wire - for you non-wire folks out there), Dr. Burke (Gray's Anatomy), Nelly, The Rock and TI. From this list, it's safe to deduce a few things about my likes. I like men with an abundance of melanin. If you're melanin challenged, like the Rock, you should definately have a nice body. If you don't have a nice body, like TI, you should definately have a confident swagger. All of these men portray an image of being smart, confident and pretty secure with themselves.

Now, what if I asked a guy I'm dating for his CHL and he had Gabrielle Union, Tamala Jones, Toni Braxton and Kelly Rowland in prominent positions? I'd think ok, cool. I'm in that range. They're all in my complexion range. They all have figures similar to mine. They're all kind of low key but still cute or even sexy to some. But, what if he said that his list contained Beyonce, Eva Mendes, Jessica Rabbit, Rihanna and that girl from the Pussy Cat Dolls? I'd probably sit there and wonder, what does he see in me, if those women are his ideal?? In the back of my mind, I'd probably store this little tidbit away.

Why would a man consider dating a woman that didn't come close to his ideal? Could it be because he doesn't think he can actually 'pull' his ideal, so he'll settle for somebody out of scope? Or maybe it's something totally different. I have no idea how men think when it comes to this.

I do know that men fall in love with women they find attractive and women become more attracted to men that they are in love with. So, our list isn't based on physical attraction alone. We include all kinds of intangibles like swagger, whether or not he's cheated on his celeb mate, sense of humor and other things like that. Whereas most guys I know don't even have to know the woman's name to add her to the list. LOL

So maybe you should ask your person who's on their CHL. Then ask them if they think you have anything in common with the people on that list. Let me know how that goes...


Sunday, November 19, 2006

Priced Out of the Market

One of my girlfriends recently accepted a very lucrative position. Of course, we're all very happy for her and proud of her. She's worked hard and deserves this opportunity. However, after the initial congratulations, we began talking about how lucky she is to already be engaged with a date set. You see, we have reason to believe that if she were single, she'd be pricing herself out of the dating market with this new position. The media is quick to tout the statistics that the higher black women move up the corporate ladder the slimmer their chances are of finding a mate.

I've heard plenty of men say that they don't have a problem with their woman making more money than them as long as the woman doesn't 'flaunt' it. I think deep down, most good men want to be the providers for their families. I also think that the person with the higher income can slip into a money power trip without meaning to. Unfortunately, when the man has the money power trip, it's expected, therefore not a big deal. But, when the woman does it, it's emasculating.

This is going to sound very retro and possibly anti-feminist, but, I don't think women can 'have it all'. Society is just not built to support us in that way. I think that it's hard to near-impossible to nurture yourself, your family AND your career. Something's going to fall by the wayside. Sometimes, we end up neglecting ourselves. We stop eating right, we don't make time to hit the gym, we don't make our monthly spa visit and we miss out on opportunities to feed our spirit.

As a woman of a certain age, considering the next stage in my life, I'm seriously troubled by the fact that my career success may translate into a relationship roadblock. How can I make it all work? My typical MO is to playdown my resume. Early on in the dating sequence, I've stopped mentioning that I have a graduate degree. Since most people not in IT don't really understand much about IT, instead of saying that I manage multi-million dollar software development projects, I just say I work on computers. LOL When I get raises and bonuses, I celebrate with my girlfriends. It's funny though, because guys that I date will share all of this information with me within the first few dates and the result is just as they expect it to be. I'm impressed and happy for them.

This all makes me think of that Jill Scott song, the one where she talks about how she can do all this stuff around the house, she can raise a child, etc. But, she still needs a man around. (The song is The Fact Is (I Need You). It's track 4 on the last CD) That's how I feel. I can deliver exceptional impromptu presentations at work, but, I still leave half empty bottles of water all around my apartment. I don't know why. (I started buying those little kid bottles so that I wouldn't have any leftovers. ;-))I just do. I am an awesome mentor to my junior team members. But, my red car has a layer of dirt on it so thick, it looks burgundy because I'm not good at the whole car washing thing. I have digestion problems, so I need somebody to rub my tummy every now and then. Sure, I could pay to have all this stuff done. But I don't want to. I want my man to do it. I just hope I don't price myself out of the market.


Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Wednesday Ramblings 11/15/2006

Have you ever had one of those moments where you find out the truth about a situation and it really blows your mood? Well, I had one of those moments and I thought I was going to talk about it. And maybe I will, one day, but I don't have words now. But, it sure is bumming me out.

Wasn't that something about Gerald Levert? I was not a big fan of him or his music but, it's sad for such a young man to die like that. Of course the fat people are equating his passing to the athletes that have heart attacks. Is this really the same situation?

I was also shocked to hear about Ed Bradley. I actually liked him. He seemed really cool and smart. He really kept his illness on the DL. He probably didn't want people to feel sorry for him. I can respect that.

Is there any good news to speak about? Well, I'm going to the DR in 2 weeks. I'm really excited. I was working alot this year and didn't make it to the beach once, so I'm glad to be able to get it in before year's end. The means I only have 2 weeks to get in shape. AARRRRRGGGGHHH the stress of it all Excuse me while I go do some squats.


Monday, November 13, 2006

Monday Update

I had a very interesting 2nd anniversary weekend. On Friday a sudden change in plans led me to a happy hour with my sister and her friends. She and I don't get to hang out often so, it was nice to spend time with her and get to know her friends. We ate, drank and danced a little. I realized that I'm a younger man magnet. Why weren't these same kind of guys trying to talk to me when I was in my 20's? Maybe because I looked 12 then. Whatever.

Saturday, I vegged out most of the day then spent the other half in search of the perfect pair of jeans. I don't know why but, I think the perfect pair of jeans will make my life so much easier. I have over 30 pairs in my closet that seem to say otherwise though. At any rate, I settled on a pair of Joe's Jeans to be my denim elixir for the next few months.

Skating was a blast. Overall, it was a very chill crowd. There were a few standouts though. Like the man in the black and gold biker shorts, yellow headband and braid down his back. We couldn't really knock him though, he was a great skater. Then there were the regulars. This was a group of guys that basically dominated the rink. They were doing all kinds of tricks and moves. They were the bomb. I set out to learn how to do all the stuff they were doing. The only difference is that I did mine on the carpet. Hey, you've gotta start somewhere. After my first few times around the rink, most of my old Shake & Bake skills came back. It was a great workout too. I'll post a pic of my warm up routine tomorrow.

Well, I'm going back to sleep now. I'll post again later. I've got alot to talk about...


ETA: The pix I promised

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Wednesday Ramblings

Whatever happened to tube socks? Do you know they are not sold anywhere anymore? I even looked online and I can't find any. Y'all know I have a thing about dressing for my events and I really wanted to wear a cute little retro tee, a denim mini and some tube socks for my little roll/bounce bday party on saturday. How cute would that be? Well, it doesn't look like it's gonna happen. I may have to sub with some regular tall knit socks instead. We'll see.

Can I just say that I am soo in love with Robin Thicke right now. That song 'Lost W/out You' is the bomb. I'm about to download the CD.

I'm lost without you
Can't help myself
How does it feel
To know that I love you baby
Lyrics of the song Lost Without You on the album The Evolution of Robin Thicke
I just love it. The way he sings it is so vulnerable and it has a kind of yearning feeling about it...without being all needy and stalkerish. LOL
That's sexy.

Monday, November 06, 2006

Low Key This Year

My birthday is coming up and I've gotten alot of messages from people asking me what I'm doing this year because they want to be included. Back in the day my friends and I would throw pretty elaborate birthday combinations. We have fall birthdays and we loved to plan combined events to maximize the fun and minimize the cost. Last year, I decided that I wasn't having birthdays anymore. I watched this show featuring Mariah Carey and she said that she has 'Anniversaries' instead. I instantly loved that idea and adapted it to my own life. So, this will be my second anniversary.

This year, all I really want to do is go rollerskating and get dressed up to go out to eat. I'm playing it low key this year. After a certain number of birthdays don't you have all the stuff you want already anyway?

Oh, but don't sleep, I'm still taking off a day of work. I said I was going low key. Not non-existent.


Wednesday, November 01, 2006

The Wire #45

I watched episode 45 of the Wire last night. I won't spoil it for anyone but, I think it's pretty obvious that Michael has been abused which explains his standoffish attitude towards Cutty. I think young Randy is gonna get killed once everyone finds out that he's been snitching. Speaking of Randy, his last name is Wagstaff, when Method Man was on the show, his last name was Wagstaff too. Is Randy his son?

I'll end now so that I don't give anything away for everyone that'll be watching the show on Sunday. Post comments after you've seen it.