Friday, June 15, 2007

U-N-I-T-Y Moment

I just had a black woman unity moment at work today. I was walking behind this attractive well-put together woman in my office and I noticed that the zipper on the back of her skirt was bursting and I could see her slip underneath. Just as I noticed this, I heard this bitter catty black woman in my office remark to another woman about the impending hole while making no effort to inform the affected woman. Ms. Bitter said, 'Yeah, she's been walking around like that all day. It's only gonna get worse.'

I was incensed. I tapped the woman with the wardrobe malfunction on the shoulder and discreetly informed her of the situation. Then I proceeded to help her fix it. I've only seen this woman in passing and I don't even know her name. But, all I could think was, if it were me, I'd want someone to help me out.

I swear black women are our own worst enemies sometimes. I can't count the many times I've heard women make disparaging remarks about other women. Remarks such as,

'I can't stand to hang around women.'
'I'd rather be friends with guys, they are less drama.'
and my personal favorite...
'Well of course she looks good, she's like a food nazi. I
can't be worried about watching what I eat all the time. Plus only a dog wants a

Why don't we realize that when we make a nasty comment about someone or attempt to lessen another woman's accomplishment, we are really disparaging ourselves? When you're happy with yourself, you're going to see the good in other people. You won't feel the need to disparage someone else. When you're a good girlfriend, you'll want to be friends with other girls.

Y'all know I'm a girl's girl. I like hanging out with guys, but, there is a reason that God made us different. A guy isn't going to obsess with you for hours about why 'he' didn't call or if those shoes go with that dress. They just aren't wired that way. My girlfriends have had my back for most of my life, but, my guy friends roll out when they get married or a new love. Even when I'm involved, I'm still tight with my girls. That's just the way it's got to be...for me.

So, I'll close this post with a suggestion...the next time you see a pretty woman walking down the street with a jacked up outfit or some other 'flaw' and you notice that it makes you feel a little bit better. Look inside yourself and figure out why her fabulousness makes you feel threatened. Then, acknowledge that there is room on this earth for more than one hottie. Her steam doesn't cool yours.


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